What do I think I'm doing?

I took a very memorable seminar at a writers convention about the arrogance of writers.  For most of us, we reach a point where we ask ourselves, "What do I think I'm doing, writing a book?  What makes me think I can compete with the big names?" 

For some, it's the need to express oneself.  For others, it's therapy - letting go of feelings they've been holding onto.  For others, it's pure ego.  Wanting recognition.  And then there are those that have a story to tell.

This seminar, in conjunction with a panel discussion by some well-known authors who admit that even after achieving their goals as a best-selling author they've had work rejected, helped to bolster this author's spirits (which were sorely sagging at the end of the first day of the conference).  After the first day, I remember feeling out of my league.  Maybe I should just go home.  But there's an inner voice that helps you along, and then there are those seminars that remind you that you are not alone.  A large number of people at that conference felt the same way and the seminar was a reminder to not give up if you are doing something you (a) truly believe in, (b) truly love.

Writing is not a lucrative career for most of us.  I tell the people at my day job it's a hobby - I don't make enough money at it to qualify it as anything else.  But like a woodworker, I refine my craft and work at it and I'd like to believe, in someone else's immortal words, that at the end of the day, my work "doesn't suck."  It gives me satisfaction -  a creative outlet.  It helps to make me well-rounded, not to mention the things you learn researching a story.

I draw on that seminar from time to time, reminding myself that even if people don't hang on my every word, it's worth something to me.  And if someone else sees value in my hard work, that answer to the question, "what do I think I'm doing?," is entertaining.  If not someone else, then my own self.  (maybe it's a problem that I'm easily amused, eh?)

Cheers.

Kindling

I don't know about you, but I like to hold a book in my hands.  A hard (or paperback) cover book with pages that you turn along with that little "swish" sound when you turn them.  There's something about the Feel of a book.  The Smell of a book.  It's a sensory experience beyond just your sight.  With the advent of electronic books, I didn't see much success for them since, arrogant person that I am, I believe most of the population likes that sensory experience along with me.

Until the Kindle.

As a commuter, I see people with Kindles on the train.  I've often thought to ask them what they thought of them, but I haven't, because more people that I actually KNOW are getting them.  I had a conversation with someone in a training class (during the break!) and she said she misses the feel of a book, but the Kindle works.  While many people, when they read, will at some point in time look where their bookmark is to judge their progress in getting through the story, the Kindle TELLS you (60% completed).  That's a little wierd, and yet, informational.

I'd looked into getting a Kindle for myself, but felt it was cost prohibitive, and at the time, they didn't read PDF files (and I already have PDF books), rather like the iPod when it was new in that you can only read what they give you and not anything else, so I didn't make the investment.  Then there was the Sony Reader.  As my husband points out, technology eventually catches up, and now the Kindle WILL read a PDF file, and the price is adjusting with more competition.  I do believe this is something I will buy - eventually.

Which brings me to the author point of view.  With publishing becoming more competitive than ever, and publishing houses complaining about the cost of producing paper books, I'm seeing the trend toward the future.  E-books are making more and more sense. 

While the Kindle will never replace the sensory feel of a new book, at least the design can appease some of what you lose.  Pushing a button is not a replacement for the swish and crinkle of turning a page, but it mimics it near enough as to be a sort of methadone until you can hold the read thing.  Maybe it's like borrowing a book from the library.  It gives you the opportunity to read it and decide if its something you want on your permanent shelf.  And then, when you find a book that warrants keeping, you can bond with it, read it all over again on a more intimate level.

What do you think about the Kindle/Sony Reader?

Focus -

My apologies for infrequent posting.  I'm sharply focused at the moment and trying to keep in the groove.  More rambling will be forthcoming!

New Year's Resolutions

I resolve . . .

To write that Christmas story (even though Christmas is over).
To start my next novel - (watched a Paranormal State marathon last week, and I'm still contemplating druids - maybe splice the two together . . . )
To ramp up marketing for Epitaph (I got so excited over the initial reaction, I didn't broaden my field as much I normally do)

But right now, I've been working on my treadmill, all the livelong day.  It was a Christmas present, and I LOVE it.  I've got these marvelous Jillian Michaels workouts that come with it (free!) and as soon as I've finished one, I want to keep going!  This is going to be a good year for my fitness level, I can feel it. This treadmill is fun.  I can plug in my iPod, I can read a book, I can watch television.  This machine tracks my food, my weight and my exercise.  Now if I could figure a way to do research while I'm hoofing away, I'd be in heaven (don't own an iPhone yet, and too cheap to justify it at this stage). 

Happy New Year!