Are Ghosts Real?

One of the most common questions I get about my ghost books is, "Do you believe in ghosts?"

That, right there, is a very complicated question. I normally reply with, "I don't NOT believe in ghosts." Have I had "extra" normal experiences? Yes. Do I believe in a psychic connection, even with living people? Yes. Not like you see on television or on those silly ghost hunter shows or even on the scary movies. Call it intuition, if you like (which is how my characters generally have "an overdeveloped sense of intuition"), but when you know someone really well, you often have a sense about them. 

I remember writing a Christmas letter to my godfather years ago when I stopped midsentence. I was overwhelmed with a sense of him, many states away, even after not talking to him in quite some time. I stopped dead in my tracks and called my mother to see if she'd heard from him recently--to see if he was all right. She hadn't heard from him. At the time, he was well, or at least he said he was. I say, "he said he was," because it was a short time later that he passed away. He was on medication that has since been pulled as treatment because the benefits no longer outweigh the risk. I credit that experience to "tuning in to him" while I was writing the letter, which allowed me to feel "something" I might have otherwise ignored. I was relieved to know I was wrong, but was I?

I've had friends that I haven't heard from that I get a sense about. Then, when my phone rings, I'm almost afraid to answer because I almost know what they're going to tell me. Some of it is intuition, or deductive reasoning based on what I already know, but it's still spooky. Sometimes you can anticipate news. That doesn't make it any less eerie when you're right. 

And then there are the ghosts. When I went to New Orleans, I remember going to sleep one night in a "haunted hotel," and telling the ghosts I was too tired and not to bother me if they were really there. There are times when I'm more receptive to a visitation than others, but I have yet to have an encounter with a spirit from beyond the veil. Maybe I should revise that - I've never seen a spirit. I have seen things that indicate there might be one nearby, or one who wants my attention for one reason or another. Seeing a ghost is a choice, both on the part of the spirit and the visited person. Do I want to see them? 

At the end of the day, I'm a coward. I don't WANT to see a spirit. At least, not most days. I choose not to acknowledge certain things, or not to search out certain things, as I'm also certain those things are out there if we look for them. As my Elspeth Barclay character says, I don't want to anchor anyone to this life for any reason. I prefer to think of them as moving on to their ultimate reward. Toward the ends of their lives, my parents frequently talked about their impending deaths. To add some levity to one of those conversations, I jokingly asked if they would come back to be my guardian angel, to which my father immediately responded -- emphatically, I might add -- "No." Alrighty then! But I get it. They've done their time in this realm and are ready to move on. I'm okay with that. I'm willing to let them go, even when it breaks my heart.

I have a friend who has told me she enjoys my books because they make her feel closer to her husband who left us too soon. She often sees signs of him, a way that he lets her know he's still with her, and my books reinforce that feeling. Likewise with another widowed friend. I have no doubt it's true in both cases. Some people might say they're looking for things as a source of comfort, to ease their grieving. While that may be true, to both of those friends I'd just like to say--

I do believe in ghosts.